Common Parenting Mistakes I Made (And Why I Don’t Regret Talking About Them)
I’ve made plenty of common parenting mistakes, and honestly? I do not try to hide from them. As a mother raising a daughter, I had the pressure to get it all “right”. I was just like any other mom who wants to do everything right.
Every. Single. Thing.
From the moment my daughter was born, I wanted to get it all perfect—her sleep, her food, her education, her emotional well-being. I was hyper-aware of every decision, every moment, every milestone.
What I didn’t realize back then was that it was all part of the journey. Because parenting isn’t about perfection. It’s about being real.
The Pressure to Be a “Perfect” Mom
I didn’t want to fail—not for me, but for my daughter. I used to feel like a guilty mom, not doing enough. So I used to stay up late scrolling parenting tips, checking milestone charts, and second-guessing every choice. I didn’t want to miss anything. Not a tear. Not a tantrum. Not a teachable moment.
But in chasing perfection, I ended up emotionally drained. Believing I had to do it all to be enough, I definitely didn’t leave room for mistakes.
What I’ve Learned:
Our kids don’t need perfect moms. They need present ones. And sometimes, they just need a mom who eats lunch and breathes deep before reacting.
Micromanaging Every Move
When my daughter started growing into her own personality, I panicked.
What if she made the wrong friend?
What if I miss the signs she’s changing?
What if she makes a bad decision?
Micromanaging felt like love at first. But it turned into one of the most common parenting mistakes I didn’t see coming. I hovered over her homework, her friendships, her choices. I thought I was protecting her, but I was really limiting her. Soon I realized that over-guiding takes away children's confidence to think on their own.
And deep down, I wasn’t trying to control her—I was trying to protect her.
What I’ve Learned:
Micromanaging comes from fear. But freedom teaches courage. My daughter grows stronger when I step back, let her fall, and show her how to get back up.
Putting Myself Last
I didn’t notice this one until I completely burned out. I thought I was doing the right thing—putting her needs first, all the time. But ignoring myself made me impatient, tired, and disconnected. We moms think that self-care is selfish. But when I started taking care of myself, I became a better mom for my daughter.
What I’ve Learned:
Self-neglect isn’t a badge of honor. It’s a warning sign. When I take care of myself, I show my daughter that moms are human too—and that loving yourself is part of being a strong woman.
Being Inconsistent with Boundaries
One day I’d say “no screen time.” The next, I’d hand her the iPad so I could get a break. One day, I’d discipline calmly. The next, I’d react out of frustration. I didn’t mean to confuse her, I just didn’t have the energy or clarity to stay consistent.
What I’ve Learned:
Kids thrive when they know what to expect. Setting loving but firm boundaries has helped both of us feel more grounded.
Why I Don’t Regret Talking About These Mistakes
It’s easy to stay silent and pretend we’ve got this parenting thing all figured out. But silence breeds shame and I refuse to raise my daughter in a home where we’re afraid to talk about hard things. Every mistake I’ve made has taught me how to be more patient, more forgiving, more human.
What I Hope My Daughter Learns from All of This
I hope she learns that motherhood isn’t about having it all together. It’s about showing up with love. It’s about apologizing when we fall short. It’s about learning, growing, and giving our children permission to do the same.
Most of all, I hope she sees me not as a perfect mom—but as a real one. Parenting is not about perfection but about growth, love, and resilience. Let's continue to support each other in this beautiful, challenging journey.
I love how this text connects on a whole other level with me because I have come to realise that human beings are not created to be perfect. We human beings are created to be guided by Allah swt and be guided to the right path. Allah swt tells us the baseline and how to move when we do stuff right and when we do it wrong. We can never be perfect in anything we do, because we are human beings. If we try to be succesful at work we forget that we did not achieve success by our own selves, rather it was God who opened that path for us. And if we become arrogant and believe wholeheartedly that we can do everything and that it is all us and not Allah swt then we will fail if Allah’s mercy leaves us. May Allah swt protect us. Recently our daughter was to start school after summer break and I had my eyes set on two Islamic schools and I was so sure they would be her fate. But she did not get a place and my heart became heavy that she was going to start at the local school. But I realised that all these events that led to this, all of it is in the Hands of Allah swt and that I cannot change anything other than what I prepare and I will not get bad grades because she will start at the local school but I will be tested as how to guide her and what I am going to do while she goes at this school. May Allah swt protects us all. Ameen.