How to pick a Muslim name
The importance of names in Islam is very high. It is crucial to know how to pick a Muslim name for your child as a parent. The names we give our children reflect our goals for them. It was narrated from Ibn 'Umar that the Prophet(ﷺ) said:
"The most beloved of names to Allah are 'Abdullah and 'Abdur-Rahman." Sunah Ibn Majah: 3728
This hadith tells us that Allah also loves certain names. We must prioritize giving our children good names. We must name our children after great personalities so they may have a role model to follow.
Importance of Names in Islam: Picking Strong Names
Boys should have strong names – names that convey meaning and history. Their names should serve as a constant reminder of who they should grow up aspiring to be. Knowing the importance of name in Islam, we must know how to pick a Muslim name for our boys and girls.
Not to mention that one of the rights of a child that parents must fulfill is his or her right to a good name.
That’s why my husband and I chose the name “Bilal” for our unborn child. His story is the stuff of legend – a slave lying on the hot desert sand being continuously tortured by his owner. Yet, he did not recant his faith. This was just the start of his journey to freedom, to righteousness, and to supporting the message of Islam.
We knew the importance of name in Islam. We wanted our child to grow up trying to embody the strength of faith that Bilal (ra) demonstrated so well. We surely would have fulfilled our child’s right to a good name by naming him “Bilal.”
Our extended family all loved the name Bilal.
But the moment our baby was born, we found out he was actually a ‘she’.
(Side note: don’t always trust ultrasounds!)
Why Did We Name Our Daughter Ruqaya?
We named our daughter ‘Ruqaya’, after the daughter of Prophet Muhammad (saw) and his wife Khadijah (ra). She was a product of their commitment and love, raised in the kindest and most generous of homes, and she was a righteous believer. Surely, a girl should also be given the right to a good name – a name that has history attached to it, a name that exudes strength and righteousness.
But some of our extended family didn’t quite agree. I still remember their words clearly:
“Ruqaya? That’s such a severe name! Why don’t you name her something lighter? Cuter?”
Perhaps it was the strong “Qaf” in the middle they didn’t like.
When deciding how to pick a Muslim name, it is important to consider the meaning behind it. Some might seek names that are softer or lighter. Set the right goals for your child before deciding a name.
Society’s Preference on How to Pick a Muslim Name:
Different people belonging to different cultures certainly have a preference when it comes to picking names for girls and boys. You see, according to them and their culture, girls should have soft, easy, cute names. Pretty two syllable names that roll off the tongue and are suitably girly.
There’s no need to burden them with strong names. Khadijah? Too heavy on the tongue! Nusaybah? No no, much too serious! Sumayyah? Who can even pronounce that?
But we threw the naysayers’ words into the wind and named her Ruqaya anyway. This is because we knew the importance of name in Islam. We knew how to pick a Muslim name that would help our daughter have a role model to follow in the future.
How to Pick a Muslim Name for our Daughters
The way daughters are treated – like fragile, simple, soft creatures to be spoiled but not empowered – starts at birth. Sometimes it even starts with a name. Some of us are unaware of how to pick a Muslim name.
Certainly not all females with strong names are treated with respect by their families. And certainly not all women with “cute” names are disempowered by their families. That’s not a reasonable conclusion.
But I ask parents of little girls – why did you name her the name she has? Was it because you wanted her to seek inspiration from its beautiful meaning (whether it’s Arabic or not)?
Was it because you named her after an important historical figure? Was it because you wanted her to live up to the strength of that name?
Or was it just because it sounded cute?
The names we give our daughters convey our intentions for how we wish to raise them – whether those intentions are conscious or not. It illustrates our beliefs about what girls can and can’t do and be. Whether their opinions and voices matter. It also suggests whether we thought they were worthy enough to warrant a true discussion about what to name them without being influenced by whatever names are currently trendy.
What Does Your Daughter’s Names Say About You?
Above all, our daughters’ names tell us something about our own values. Unfortunately, they sometimes highlight our hypocrisy…
We name our daughters “A’isha” after one of the smartest, most educated women in the faith – but we refuse to really educate them. We name our daughters Sumayyah, after the first martyr in Islam – but we recoil when we learn they want to stand up for what they believe in. Don’t make waves we tell them. We name them Aasiya, Maryam, Hajar, Safiyyah and yet we want them to sit at home and do nothing.
How to pick a Muslim name should me more than just picking a cute name. The name must also reflect the virtues that our daughters will develop.
Conclusion:
A flower by any other name would smell as sweet, right? Yes, a woman destined by God to be strong and faithful will be strong and faithful, she will have her own voice, regardless of what she’s named.
But as parents we set the stage for our daughters by naming them. Through their names, we are asking them to be a certain kind of person.
What kind of person do you want your daughter to be?
If you have clear goals and know how to pick a Muslim name, you will pass on a legacy to your child.
